Spark
by Devon Goes to Heaven
Summary: In which Beth is paired off with Rick after the prison falls and unexpected emotions build between them.
1. Spark

**Disclaimer:** I do not own The Walking Dead or any of the characters portrayed on the show. I'm merely writing this for my own amusement.

_I'm a die-hard Bethyl shipper, but I don't know. I just find rare ships so much easier to write for. It's pretty much similar to the episode still, but with Rick instead of Daryl. I'll probably add more to this, but I can't promise frequent updates. Anyways, tell me what you think! Enjoy! :D_

_Spark_

Two weeks had passed, and Beth could still remember _that day_ like it was yesterday. She remembered the moment the Governor confronted the prison, to her fathers death, and finally to the moment she met up with Rick with Judith tucked safely in her arms.

For days Rick searched the woods, streets, and various neighborhoods for Carl. Beth had nearly passed out from lack of sleep and sheer exhaustion. Beth had finally suggested to find stability for Judith, and thankfully Rick relented to stay in a house.

Rick was rarely home. He would say that he was going on a run, but Beth knew that he was actually searching for Carl. Sometimes he wouldn't return at night, and she would fear that he had been bitten or killed. She feared that he would leave her alone to take care of Judith, and she feared she wouldn't last longer than a month on her own.

Reading was the only thing that could keep her calm when Rick left the house. Beth cracked open a shoddy copy of _Outlander_ as she sat next to Judith's crib. She remember that her mother had always liked the books, and she found herself being sucked in as well. She found herself wishing she could be transported back to a time before hers just like the character in the novel. She imagined that she'd try and warn people of what was to come.

A wave of relief rushed through her when she heard a knock at the front door. Rick made it back from his run, and she practically bolted down the stairs. She ran to the door and untied the extension cord wrapped around the knob. She unlocked both locks and pulled the door open.

Rick entered with a bag in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other hand. She shut the door behind him, and began to tie the door again as Rick collapsed onto the couch. She watched as he twisted the top off of the bottle of whiskey. Beth had never pictured Rick to be a drinker, but she supposed he had to find some comfort somewhere after their loses.

"How's Judith?"

"Sleeping," Beth replied. "I'm guessing you didn't find anyone."

"No," he said, disdain clear in his voice.

Beth watched as Rick slugged back the bottle of Maker's Mark. She walked over to the couch, and took a seat next to Rick.

"I've never had a drink before," she said.

"No," he said as he set the bottle down on the coffee table. "You're eighteen."

Beth eyed Rick with envy as his lips touched the bottle of liquor. Rick had caught her staring, and she jerked her head away. She had expected him to chastise her, but he passed the bottle to her. Beth's lips quirked up into a small smile as she took the bottle in her hands.

"I had my first drink when I was sixteen."

Beth stared down at the bottle, debating whether or not she really wanted a taste. She drew in a deep breath and took a long sip. The bitter taste of the whiskey hit her, and she swallowed as fast as she could. She covered her mouth with the back of her hand and coughed furiously.

"That's the most disgusting thing I've ever tasted," she said.

He laughed at her comment. "You don't drink alcohol for the taste."

She took another sip and handed the bottle back to Rick. Her head began to feel light, and she found that it soothed her worries. She waited for Rick to hand her the bottle again, and she took in another sip.

It wasn't long before the alcohol hit. She leaned on Rick's shoulder and snuggled close to him as he put his arm around her. She was grateful that fate had allowed her to be with him. She thought of some of the _inmates_ she could have been stuck with, and though she preferred Maggie, she was still glad that she was with Rick as opposed to someone she hardly knew.

She had remembered glancing into his blue eyes when he placed his hat on her head. She had remembered that brief thought that had crossed her head, the one where she had thought of how handsome he had was – the thought where she felt a hint of envy for his late wife. That thought reemerged and the alcohol intensified it.

It felt wrong to her. She was so young, and he was a much older man. He had already had a child, a marriage, and a paternal family life before the world went to hell. Before the walkers, she was just a teenage girl taking selfies on her iPhone in the high school bathroom. Their life experience felt as if it they miles apart. She couldn't see Rick crossing that kind of line. Beth told herself needed someone like Michonne or Carol, someone that could understand him.

It must have been the alcohol in her system. That's what she told herself as she leaned forward and kissed him on the lips. She had expected him to push her away. He let her kiss him. He exhaled roughly and snatched the bottle of liquor from the coffee table. He took another shaky sip from the bottle.

"Beth," his voice cracked as he said her name. "I'm not sure this is a good idea."

His words seemed to prick her skin. She let his words hang in the air unanswered. She didn't not wish to anger him. So, she resigned to snuggling into his chest. She felt his fingers touch her back, and her stomach swelled as several thoughts circled her head. Part of her hoped he would dismiss her, and he would go straight to his room. She expected that would be how he would react. That was how a man should react in his position.

She swallowed the nervous lump in her throat and tilted her head upward to gaze up at him. She felt so unsure, so insecure about every little thought that entered her mind. She felt his lips touch hers, and she felt some kind of spark within her flare up like wildfire.

Within moments, an innocent peck on the lips grew into something more. She laid underneath him on the couch and pulled against the buttons of Rick's plaid shirt. Her breath quickened as she attempted to remove his shirt.

And, then, he pulled away from her. His right hand was clutching the side of his head. His blue eyes were full of guilt as he stared down at her.

"I'm sorry. I'm just drunk," he said as he fumbled with the buttons his shirt. "And, so are you. This ain't right."

He snatched the bottle of bourbon from the coffee table, and she watched as he staggered out of the room. She wanted to call out to him. She wanted to tell him that it was okay, but she just laid back into the couch with an exasperated sigh.

Beth stared up at the ceiling. The room felt as if it were spinning, and she couldn't even process her thoughts. She imagined that things would be awkward the next morning. He might not even talk to her, and it broke her heart a bit. She soothed her emotions.

Maybe he might reconsider. She hoped that maybe he would.


	2. Guilt

**AN: **Thank you so much for all your comments! I appreciated all of your kind words. I'm going to try to make the chapters longer after this one, but I just felt like there wasn't anything else I could add. Anyways, enjoy!

_Guilt_

The moment he had woken up, Rick felt like guilt had punched him straight in the gut. He remembered it. He remembered letting her kiss him, letting her unbutton his shirt, almost letting it go further...

He tried laid blame on the alcohol and the stress of losing the prison. He tried to convince himself that he wasn't attracted to her, and he was projecting his late wife onto the caretaker of his daughter. It didn't completely stifle his feelings of guilt, but it did make him feel a little bit more at ease.

Rick was grateful that she was sleeping when he left. He feared what kind of conversation would take place if she were still awake. He wasn't even sure if he could look the poor girl in the eyes again after what had occurred.

He searched the woods for Carl mostly, but also in hopes of finding someone. If he found Daryl or Michonne, he wouldn't be alone with her again. They wouldn't have to have that awkward conversation where he'd spurn her affections, and they wouldn't have to travel with that emotional block between them.

"Carl!"

It had to be the hundredth time he called out for his son. He hated the fact that it'd draw attention to him, but he hoped that maybe his son would hear him. He envisioned Carl rushing through the woods to him. He imagined throwing his arms around his son and thanking everything for bringing his son to him.

That didn't occur though. He heard that familiar snarl from a walker, and he pulled his knife from it's sheath. He watched as it stumbled over a log, and he took that moment to stab the walker straight through his head. He withdrew the knife and returned it to its sheath.

He glanced up at the sky through the sea of leaves and branches above him. The sun was going down. Rick debated staying out overnight, but he exhaustion had gotten the best of him. He need a good night's sleep to get his thoughts together.

Aside from that, if he stayed out too late, Beth might take it out on herself. Rick wanted to avoid the impeding conversation that was bound to happen at some point, but he didn't want her to start believing that he didn't want her around him. The girl was an eighteen year old girl with misplaced feelings of hero worship. He was sure that she didn't even fully understand how she felt about him.

He sucked in a deep breath. He hoped that maybe she'd just pretend that nothing happened, but he was realistic enough to know that probably wouldn't be the case. He exhaled deeply. That damn whiskey – that was the cause of all of this.

* * *

Beth sat next to Judith's crib. After about an hour of crying, Judith had finally quieted herself.

Her stomach flipped when Rick crossed her mind. She had been thinking about the events of the previous night throughout the day, and it was driving her absolutely nuts.

Beth felt nothing but shame for how she acted. She should have known better not to approach Rick in that way. She wasn't even sure what compelled her to act on her small crush on him. It was so silly, so incredibly stupid of her. They had just lost their home, _their family. _

"I'm so stupid, Judith," she whispered.

Judith cooed back at her, and she let out a soft giggle. She was so grateful to have found Judith before unspeakable things happened to her. Beth loved that baby to death. She loved that baby like she were her own daughter.

She felt a small stab in her heart at that thought. Perhaps taking care of Judith where the cause of her feelings for Rick.

_She could be Shane's_.

No, Beth was sure she was Rick's daughter. Judith had his best feature, his soft blue eyes. Judith was Rick's child, and Beth refused to believe otherwise.

She watched Judith pop her thumb in her mouth, and that image alleviated her anxiety for just a moment. She smiled softly as she reached down to brush Judith's cheek.

"We're going to find your brother," Beth said. "We're going to find the rest of our people, and it's going to be normal again. I promise."

Judith let out some sort of happy little squeal. It brought another smile to her lips, and for that moment, she actually believed the promise she made.

A knock at the door interrupted her thoughts. Her stomach dropped instantly. She smoothed her hair out of her eyes and inhaled a huge breath of air. She made her way down the flight of stairs and to the door. She untied the knots and pulled the door open.

Her eyes met Rick's, and she her knees became weak instantaneously.

"Hey," her voice quivered a tad.

"Hey," he replied.

She tried to say that apology she had rehearsed in her head over and over, but she was at a loss for words. She just watched as he walked passed her and sat on the couch.

She jammed her hands in her jean pockets and shifted her feet. She bit her lower lip as she waited for him to speak.

"Beth," his voice was shaky, and she knew whatever he had to say wasn't going to be exactly pleasant to hear. "What happened last night–"

"I'm really sorry," she interrupted. "I wasn't thinking."

"It's not all your fault. I did some things that were inappropriate," he said.

She glanced down at her feet. The conversation was going better than she had hoped it might, but she still felt a tinge of pain. She clenched her fists together in her pockets and fought her emotions.

She forced herself to walk over to the couch, and she sat as far from him as she possibly could. She caught herself wishing that she could lay her head on him like the night before, and she felt a tinge of pain when she realized that she probably would never be able to be affectionate with him again.

_Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!_

She had made it weird between them. She wouldn't be able to embrace him. She wouldn't be able to cuddle with him, and now their conversations would become strained. The gravity of her situation was dawning on her, and she could fell her heart shatter at her sudden realization.

"I'm gonna – I'm gonna go check on Judith," her tongue nearly tripped over her words.

She pulled herself off of the couch. Her entire body seemed to sting as she forced herself up the stairs. She hadn't realized how serious her feelings for him until this very moment.

Her breath was staggered as she paused halfway up the stairs. She had never faced this kind of rejection before, and it was more painful than she ever imagined it would be.

"Beth," she heard him call.

Her heart stuttered, and she felt as if she were punched in the gut. She forced herself to walk down the stairs.

"Pack your things tonight," he said. "We can't stay here. We need to find some place more permanent to settle."

"Okay" she agreed. "I'll make sure everything's packed."

Beth made her way back of the stairs and retreated to her room. Her shoulders were tense as she allowed her conversation with Rick to sink in. She brought her fingers to her lips as she tried to push away her emotions. She glanced over at Judith whom was now sound asleep. Then, she began her to pack for tomorrow.


End file.
